Curry & Rice Girl

After the Laddoo Shop, it's time for the Curry & Rice Girl (link via Sashi) -

Few times I checked the magazine ads,
I even tried in the Indian chat
Coz I really want to find the right girl,
I want a curry and rice girl.
I asked my dad and I asked my mom
Put my biodata on Shaadi.com
Coz they want to find the right girl,
They really dont want a white girl.

My favorite part is where the prospective bride turns out to be a man.

Wicked Meter Rating: 8/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Holla Back Girl, Desi Videos

How to Spell Sloppily

India's biggest bookstore chain cannot spell right! PrufrockTwo posts pictures of misspelled author's names at Crossword Juhu.

Amit is at his sarcastic best in a related post -

Any young, minimally educated Indian can now get easy jobs in the BPO industry that pay far more than what Crossword can afford for its sales staff. As a result, Sriram used to find it almost impossible to hire attendants who actually knew anything about books. Now it would seem that Crossword can't even hire managers who know how to spell. Sriram's strategy was to make up for this with ambience and a friendly environment at his stores. It works because most of his customers presumably don't care about spellings, and don't want the breadth and depth on display that PrufrockTwo and I would wish for.

I'm sure Mr. Salman Rushidie will not be very amused by his new spelling!

Wicked Meter Rating: 6/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Sarcasm, Books

Playing Games at the Coffee Shop

The Devil loves a wicked love story and this one by LivingHigh at Caferati is so wicked that it's sweet -

The key to good flirting is confidence. If you have that, even the corniest of pick up lines will not let you down. And of course, he knew it. He'd been doing this forever. He was a player. Keen and sharp, with a seductive smile on his lips that all the candidates who met him here for coffee would ache to reach over and kiss, but would hold themselves just back. He knew how he did it, even though they didn't.

Clothes are terribly over-rated in the sense that she never bothered to dress up too much for her tricks. She was meeting them evening after evening, coffee after coffee, because she wanted to, and a girl can't get dressed up all the time, she reasoned. So she would walk over from her office which was a short walk away from the coffee shop, play with her hair, undo the jacket, apply some brief gloss, and she would be perfect. It was the way she handled herself. The confidence, the poise, the combination of good girl and bad girl that made men turn their heads when she walked by.

There are those who hunt and there are those who are hunted. The fun begins when two hunters meet.

Wicked Meter Rating: 8/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Love Story, Fiction

Breaking Ground by Taking Off Clothes

Siddhartha at Sepia Mutiny previews the "Sexy South Asian Girls of 2007" bikini calendar from DesiClub.com -

Connoisseurs of the genre will also note the blend of representational approaches taken from white and black girlie pubs, although all the models but one are rather light skinned, surprise surprise. The text seems to follow the standard format with models listing their hobbies (which include "bubble baths," "wearing stilettos," "eating cupcakes," "partying," and "shopping, shopping and more shopping") and aspirations (similar).

Saroosh Gull, publisher of DesiClub.com says that -

...our main objective in producing this calendar was to showcase the beauty of South Asian women and to project an image to the mainstream market that South Asian women are just as "American," being beautiful, attractive and capable in the mainstream fashion and modelling world as Latinas, Blacks, Whites and other Asians, if not more so. By advancing with this agenda, we are doing something that has never been done before, which makes this entire project and the impact it will have truly ground breaking.

Breaking ground by taking off clothes is not a new idea, by the way. Check out the IT Screen Goddess Calendar which was brought out in August last year to -

...Smash through the perception of the geeky technologist and raise awareness of the diversity of Women in IT...

Wicked Meter Rating: 6/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Desi Babes, Bikini Calendar

In Defense of Indian Men

According to a BBC report, a survey of more than 1,000 men in India has found that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men. In fact, more than half of the men measured had penises that were shorter than international standards for condoms. Biswanath defends Indian men and remembers a wicked anecdote -

At a sex shop in London's Soho area, I once saw a bunch of young girls choosing from among colourful dildos -- they could have been in a bookshop browsing through Jeffrey Archers and Sidney Sheldons. Finally they found the right one -- gleefully so -- and got it gift-wrapped: perhaps a birthday gift for a friend. I don't know whether their choice was based on length or girth -- or maybe both -- but I still remember the colour of the fake you-know-what: pink!

The Devil also recommends earlier posts on the correlation between war and condom sales and the rabbit.

Wicked Meter Rating: 6/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Condoms, Sex Toys

Stalinmon, Leninmon & Mao Tse Tungmon

Have you ever wondered why so many Mallu names end in "mol" and "mon"? Did you know that Stalinmon, Leninmon and Mao Tse Tungmon are brothers? Flaash Gordon writes a beginner's guide to Mallu names (via DesiPundit)-

There's an unwritten code that you have to make sure the name has enough similar rhyming names ; or the non-rhyming one feels cut-off from the family tree. You cannot call the first one Bejoy; the second one Rejoy but the third one Avaraachan. Avaraachan would then be victim of apartheid within his family and the mental scars it leaves would make him do something tragic in life such as say, become a teetotaller or worse; go to work on a hartal day!

And finally, have you ever wondered what Osama Bin Laden has to do with a post on Mallu names? Find out.

Wicked Meter Rating: 6/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Mallu, Kerala

Wicked Little Black Dresses

Like a lot of other wickedness, Chandru is behind this one. It all started when he sent Amit a link to Top 10 Affordable Little Black Dresses for Plus-Size Women, and started off a debate on big vs small -

Amit digs big -

Listen, big asses are glorious things. Abundant hips are joyous. No man has ever complained about a woman being too chesty. All you dieting women out there, on the orders of India Uncut, instantly go and consume a chocolate. And an ice-cream. A gellato, while you're at it. What's that, jalebi? Go right ahead! Let today be your Eat-For-Happiness Day.

- while Saket is all for small -

Melon sized boobs are so ugly. That is the reason I never liked Pamela Anderson (or Rakhi Sawant even). Thats the reason I don’t prefer porn made by Vivid Video. Big boobs mean distorted nipples. Lots of large chested women have all-aeriole and no nipple. And that sucks, seriously (Err… to be more precise, that is actually more difficult to suck). I think small but shapely breasts are yummy. Size can go to hell. As an afterthought, I think I would love to have sex with Kate Moss. Is there something wrong with that?

Well, small or big, a little black dress is a little black dress and a little black dress is a wicked thing indeed.

Wicked Meter Rating: 6/10.

Technorati Tags: Desi, Wicked, Funny, Breasts, Rakhi Sawant, Kate Moss, Pamela Anderson